WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT DIVORCE

Matthew 19:3-9; I Corinthians 7:10-16

The church is not only the Body of Christ, but it is also the Bride of Christ (Rev. 19:7-9). This twofold relationship was foreshadowed in the Garden of Eden when Eve, taken from the body of Adam, became his bride. Marriage then is a type of the relationship between Christ and His Bride. It is an institution divinely ordained of God and should be regarded as holy even as the church’s relationship to Christ is holy. Thus the command is given en Eph. 5:25-27).

Divorce has rapidly increased until now approximately one marriage out of five ends in divorce. Among the reasons for this increase of divorces is a decrease in the influence of the Bible and Bible standards of living, a decrease in sex morality, the feminist movement with its emphasis on the independence of women, and the increase in the percentage of people who come to adulthood and marriage without any discipline in the home, without respect for authority.

When people are converted and set out to live according to the standards of the Bible, divorces decrease. The Bible teaches that marriage should never be broken except by death, that the only legitimate reason for divorce is continued adultery, that is, fornication, and that Christian people can readjust wrecked happiness, re-grow marital love. The home where there is disagreement, quarreling, broken vows, abuse, and even hatred, can be made into a happy home by the grace of God.

MARRIAGE IS A LIFETIME CONTRACT

In the teaching of Jesus on the question of marriage and divorce, several plain facts stand out, facts that should not be forgotten or overlooked.

1. One comes to marriage leaving father and mother and all else. The husband is to “cleave to his wife”.

2. Of man and wife it is said, “The two shall be one flesh.” A man and wife actually become one. A husband and wife literally become one in the bodies of their children. In a normal and happy marriage, man and wife become a part of each other in a spiritual sense so that breaking the marriage is like rending the body apart. In their thoughts, customs, aims, enjoyment, hopes, and interests a man and wife become one.

3. God Himself seals every marriage, making it official and binding. People are not always wise in their marriage choices. They do not always do right to marry. Whether the marriage is good or bad, God Himself seals it and joins the husband and wife together. God makes every marriage binding. So the Lord says, “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.”

The Bible has two verses on divorce and remarriage, Deuteronomy 24:1-4, Matthew 19:4-6.  If there is a conflicting verse between the Old and the New Testament, the New Testament verse will take president. The New Testament is the moral rule that the church should follow.

What the Bible says about divorce is clear, if two Christians are married to each other. There is no such thing as divorce. In fact, another verse in the Bible which is in the Old Testament says, “For I hate divorce!” says the Lord, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.” (Malachi 2:16)

Other Scriptures bear out the same teaching that marriage is binding until death (I Cor. 7:39). After one’s mate dies, God gives the privilege of marrying again. But all marriage is intended to be a lifetime contract broken only by death.

Under the Mosaic Law, violation of the marriage covenant was punishable by death (Lev. 20:10). Under the time of Grace, the death sentence was suspended and the violator was given a chance to repent. This was exemplified in Christ’s pardoning of the woman taken in adultery (Jn. 8:1-11).

DIVORCE PERMITTED UNDER THE LAW; BUT, UNDER GRACE, FOR ONLY ONE CAUSE

When the Pharisees came to Jesus tempting Him, they asked if a man could put away his wife for every cause (Matt. 19:3) Jesus conceded that under the Mosaic Law this was permitted, but only because of the hardness of their hearts. Because of this hardness of heart, God had said, “I gave them statutes that were not good” (Ezek. 20:25). The divorce law was not good, but God gave it to them as it was the best provision that could be made under the circumstances. But from the beginning, God did not intend this. God never sanctions divorce except for the cause of fornication.

Jesus disapproved of divorce. Since we have been told that a person is bound by the law of the marriage partner until death, why did Jesus make this exception? This statement may be understood in the light of Deuteronomy 22:13-21. Here the law declares that if a man takes a woman for his wife and he discovers that the tokens of her virginity be lacking, she is to be condemned to death by stoning. The following verse (22) also added that violation of the marriage vows was punishable by death.

By the commission of this sin, the violator of the marriage vow forfeited life. Thus, if the penalty of the law were carried out, the guilty partner of the marriage died. The significant point to note in this connection is that death breaks the bond of marriage.

If people will accept the honest position that marriage is to be dissolved only by death, they will be slower to marry. They will also be slower to go into sin which might ruin the happiness of marriage. But marriage is not to be broken for any reason but fornication.

The Scriptures indicate that no divorce is recognized by the Lord unless one of the mates has been guilty of fornication. A couple, divorced on unscriptural grounds, is still regarded as married in God’s sight (Matt. 19:9). A married person in taking another wife or husband commits adultery because he is already married. When a man takes a divorced woman whose marriage was not broken by fornication, he is taking a married woman. God still counts the marriage binding until it is broken by fornication. No one should ever plan to get a divorce for drunkenness, nonsupport, cruelty, desertion, incompatibility, or for any reason other than for persistent adultery, called fornication.

FORNICATION BREAKS THE MARRIAGE AND ALLOWS DIVORCE

When Jesus said there should be no divorce “except it be for fornication,” we have to fully understand what the sin of fornication is. The word for fornication is the Greek word “Porneia,” the term for whoredom. The word, in the Greek, has the same root as does the word for whoremonger and the word for a harlot. So what Jesus meant to say was that unless the wife played the harlot, or unless the husband were a whoremonger, divorce should not be sought nor granted.

A careful checking of the use of the word “fornication” in the Scriptures shows that it is an inclusive word. All adultery is fornication, but not all fornication is adultery. Adultery, generally speaking, refers to an act in which at least one of the persons is married. Fornication, on the other hand, may include illicit relations of unmarried persons, adultery, incest, homosexuality, sodomy, or other perversions.

In the Ten Commandments, “Thou shalt not commit adultery” covers all sexual sins. The Ten Commandments not only forbids immorality on the part of married people but also rebukes the same sin by unmarried people. This is clearly seen in the reference in Jude 7, to the judgment on Sodom for its perversions. Likewise, when the apostles wrote to the gentiles “to abstain...from fornication” (Acts 15:20), it is clear that they were not referring just to unmarried persons but to the whole Church. In the Bible, the word adultery is used for a single act of illegitimate intercourse, while the word fornication is used for a course of whoredom or harlotry.

Lost in the debate over the exception clause is the fact that, whatever “marital unfaithfulness” means, it is an allowance for divorce, not a requirement for it. Even when adultery is committed, a couple can, through God’s grace, learn to forgive and begin rebuilding their marriage. God has forgiven us of so much more. Surely we can follow His example and even forgive the sin of adultery (Ephesians 4:32). However, in many instances, a spouse is unrepentant and continues in sexual immorality. That is where Matthew 19:9 can possibly be applied.

Though God permits divorce for fornication, He does not require it. Jesus never commanded, nor is there any statement in the Bible, that marriage necessarily ought to be broken for any sin or any cause. The Lord permits divorce for fornication, that is whoredom by one of the mates, but He does not demand it.

WHY DOES VIOLATION OF THE MARRIAGE COVENANT CARRY SO SEVERE A PENALTY?

These days when moral standards are so low, it is possible that some may think that the penalty for the sin of fornication is too severe. Actually, the penalty is in keeping with the seriousness of the sin.

1. Violation of the marriage vow is a betrayal of the most sacred trust of human life.

2. It is a violation of Divine law.

3. It destroys the sanctity of the marriage and the home.

4. It is a sin against the body, the temple of the Holy Ghost.

5. It involves the possibility of bringing into the world an illegitimate child.

6. The violation of the marriage law usually results in ruining the happiness of other innocent persons.

The Bible makes it abundantly clear that God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and that reconciliation and forgiveness should mark a believer’s life (Luke 11:4; Ephesians 4:32). However, God recognizes that divorce will occur, even among His children. A divorced and/or remarried believer should not feel any less loved by God, even if the divorce and/or remarriage is not covered under the possible exception clause of Matthew 19:9.

The phrase “and marries another” (Matthew 19:9) indicates that divorce and remarriage are allowed in an instance of the exception clause, whatever it is interpreted to be. It is important to note that only the innocent party is allowed to remarry. Although not stated in the text, it would seem the allowance for remarriage after divorce is God’s mercy for the one who was sinned against, not for the one who committed the sexual immorality.